According to You
by Lemonly
Summary: Instead of doing the funk number, Rachel decides that it would be better to knock Jesse off his game by making him jealous. And what better person to do the job than one Noah Puckerman


**Vocal Adrenaline retaliated after the funk number and issued a new challenge. This is New Directions response.**

"What are we going to do?" Mercedes asked after Shue hung up the phone.

"Yeah. They rocked their song and we can't compete with that." Kurt said.

"We can and we will. We need to pick a song that will break their heart. Or at least piss it off. And yes, I am referring to Jesse." Rachel put in, crossing her legs.

"You know him best, Rach. Pick a song that would really get to him." Shue instructed.

"Give me your phone, Rachel." Santana ordered.

"Why?" Rachel asked, handing the other girl her cell phone.

"I'm helping you delete his number. When he calls, just pretend you don't know who it is. And then say you don't recognize the name. Trust me on this Rachel, it works."

"Okay. I think we should do According to You. It describes my relationship with Jesse perfectly. Also, he absolutely hates that song."

"Sounds good." Mr. Shue said, nodding.

"Who's going to be the 'him'?" Brittany asked. Seeing the confused looks everyone gave her, she continued, "You know the song. There's according to you, Jesse, and according to him. Who's him going to be?"

"Well, who would piss Jesse off the most?" Kurt asked. Everyone was silent then, one by one, they turned to look at Puck.

"What?" he asked, seeing everyone looking at him.

"You are a boyfriend's worst nightmare. That carries over to exs. I mean, who want their girlfriend, or ex, to get close to the resident badass lady's man." Artie explained.

"And Jesse never liked you in the first place. He hated how close you and Rachel are. I don't know how many times I heard him complaining about it." Finn put in.

"I guess it won't be that bad" Puck said, looking over to Rachel.

"I mean, we are best friends." Rachel responded.

"And you guys have great sexual tension." Tina put in.

"It's very logical." Quinn said, knowing about Puck and Rachel's true feelings toward eachother.

"Alright." Puck agreed.

"Here's what we're going to do…" Santana plotted.

"Due to your immature prank, we decided to beat you at something a little more… emotional." Santana said, glaring at Jesse and then walking to her spot. The band started playing and Rachel's voice filled the auditorium.

_According to you  
I'm stupid,  
I'm useless,  
I can't do anything right.  
According to you  
I'm difficult,  
hard to please,  
forever changing my mind.  
I'm a mess in a dress,  
can't show up on time,  
even if it would save my life.  
According to you. According to you.  
_

Rachel moved around Jesse. He scoffed, pretending this wasn't effecting him but sank further into his seat. She was perfect and he said everything he could to her to make her seem less perfect. Too make it easier for him to break her heart. None of it had worked. She was singing right in his ear and he knew he was about to regret everything. Right before he came to the conclusion, she ran off toward the stage, where Noah Puckerman caught her and spun her around.

_But according to him  
I'm beautiful,  
incredible,  
he can't get me out of his head.  
According to him  
I'm __funny__,  
irresistible,  
everything he ever wanted.  
Everything is opposite,  
I don't feel like stopping it,  
so baby tell me what I got to lose.  
He's into me for everything I'm not,  
according to you.  
_

Rachel smiled genuinely for the first time in a long time. Noah really did think she was beautiful. She could tell he wasn't just doing the choreography, he was enjoying being as close to her as he was. While it would take her forever to make Jesse give her a real smile, it took only a matter of seconds to get that from Noah. He loved her for her. She didn't need to pretend around him and she really liked that. She really liked Noah. She could go as far as saying that she loved him. He saw the things in her that Jesse didn't, and for that, she could see herself and Noah lasting through anything.

_According to you  
I'm boring,  
I'm moody,  
you can't take me any place.  
According to you  
I suck at telling __jokes__ cause I always give it away.  
I'm the girl with the worst attention span;  
you're the boy who puts up with that.  
According to you. According to you. _

Jesse growled slightly as Puck moved closer to Rachel. He never liked the mohawked boy and the relationship he shared with Rachel. Rachel's smile grew bigger seeing Jesse's expression darken. There had been many times when he had complained about her boring him. Or about how she had horrible mood swings. One minute she was ready to have sex with him and the next, she was crying in her bathroom, leaving him aroused and aggravated. She tried on many occasions to tell him a funny joke she had heard but she never got to finish it because he wasn't interested. She got distracted so easily, using by Puckerman and he just barely put up with it. He just couldn't understand her.

_But according to him  
I'm beautiful,  
incredible,  
he can't get me out of his head.  
According to him  
I'm funny,  
irresistible,  
everything he ever wanted.  
Everything is opposite,  
I don't feel like stopping it,  
so baby tell me what I got to lose.  
He's into me for everything I'm not,  
according to you.  
_

Puck moved closer to Rachel as began to sing the chorus again. She threw he arms around him as he picked her up and spun her around. Setting her back down, he wrapped his arms around her and they swayed slightly, reveling in the truth of the words. Their eyes connected and they knew what the other was thinking. Rachel smiled brightly once again.

_I need to feel appreciated,  
like I'm not hated. oh- no-.  
Why can't you see me through his eyes?  
It's too bad you're making me decide.  
_

Rachel turned in his arms and they tightened around her. Puck sent Jesse a smirk and Jesse glared. Rachel's smile grew seeing this. She made her decision and she decided that she should have chosen Noah long ago.

_According to you  
I'm stupid,  
I'm useless,  
I can't do anything right._

Rachel gave one last glare to Jesse and turned in Puck's arms. As the song came to an end, she kissed Puck lightly. As she pulled away, she was pulled right back and they started making out on the stage. New Directions began cheering loudly and even Mr. Shue joined in. Once Puck and Rachel separated, they began laughing. Rachel finally had what she deserved and Puck fully intend to make sure things stayed that way.


End file.
